About Me
I am a passionate and motivated Psychosexual Therapist with many years experience working for the NHS and in the Private Sector.
I am an Accredited Psychosexual Therapist, a BACP Accredited Therapist, a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and EMDR Therapist and Senior Supervisor.
I am Psychosexual Service Lead for Bolton providing psychosexual intervention to individuals and couples, with sex and/or relationship difficulties.
I am also a university lecturer, teaching Psychosexual Therapy and to Post-Graduate Psychosexual students. I have several years of experience providing intervention to young people, individuals, couples and groups.
I also have several years of experience providing psychosexual intervention with young people at Brook Young People’s Service. I also have specialised experience of working Harmfull Sexualised Behaviour with young people.
I work with
- Companies
- Couples
- Families
- Individuals
- Private healthcare referrals
Special Interests
Like all UKCP registered psychotherapists and psychotherapeutic counsellors I can work with a wide range of issues, but here are some areas in which I have a special interest or additional experience.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) integrates many already successful components of a range of therapeutic approaches. However, EMDR also has many unique features. EMDR is therapist lead in a series of lateral eye movements while the patient simultaneously focuses on various aspects of a disturbing memory. The left – right eye movements in EMDR therapy are a form of “bilateral stimulation”. Other forms of bilateral stimulation used by EMDR therapists include alternating bilateral sound using headphones and alternating tactile simulation using a handheld device that vibrates or taps to the back of the patient’s hands.
EMDR was developed by American clinical psychologist Francine Shapiro in the 1980s (F. Shapiro, 1989). The therapy involves the identification of unprocessed traumatic or other distressing experiences that are continuing to drive an individual’s psychological disturbance. The client is asked to recall the worst aspect of the memory together with the accompanying currently held negative cognitions and associated bodily sensations. Simultaneously they are directed to move their eyes from side to side, or employ some other form of bilateral stimulation (BLS). The effect is to desensitise the client to the distressing memory but, more importantly, to reprocess the memory so that the associated cognitions become more adaptive
EMDR therapy can treat a wide range of psychological problems that result from trauma. The goal of EMDR is to fully process past experiences and resolve the negative emotions attached to those experiences. Negative thoughts and feelings that are no longer useful are replaced with positive thoughts and feelings that will encourage healthier behaviour and social interactions.
How does EMDR work?
When a person is involved in a distressing event, they may feel overwhelmed and their brain may be unable to process the information like a normal memory. The distressing memory seems to become frozen on a neurological level. When a person recalls the distressing memory, the person can re-experience what they saw, heard, smelt, tasted or felt, and this can be quite intense. Sometimes the memories are so distressing, the person tries to avoid thinking about the distressing event to avoid experiencing the distressing feelings.
Some find that the distressing memories come to mind when something reminds them of the distressing event, or sometimes the memories just seem to just pop into mind. The alternating left-right stimulation of the brain with eye movements, sounds or taps during EMDR, seems to stimulate the frozen or blocked information processing system.
In the process the distressing memories seem to lose their intensity, so that the memories are less distressing and seem more like ‘ordinary’ memories. The effect is believed to be similar to that which occurs naturally during REM sleep (Rapid Eye Movement) when your eyes rapidly move from side to side. EMDR helps reduce the distress of all the different kinds of memories, whether it was what you saw, heard, smelt, tasted, felt or thought.
Whether you are gay, lesbian, bisexual, heterosexual or transgender, if you are experiencing problems or difficulties in your sexual relationship, our psychosexual therapists can help you resolve them.
The following are some of the problems we address:
Breakdown in a couple's sexual relationship
Loss of sexual desire
Painful intercourse
Difficulties with orgasm
Arousal disorders
Erectile dysfunction
Premature or delayed ejaculation
If a couple were to come to a psychosexual therapist they would typically be asked to engage in a behavioural programme aimed to increase physical and emotional intimacy. The first step of this programme is that penetrative sex is off the menu and the couple are asked to carry out a gentle touching exercise. The focus here is on sensuality and the purpose of a sex and genital touching ban is that this reduces performance pressure and allows the couple to just be together without thinking about ‘what next’. The therapist would normally ask for the exercises to be carried out 2-3 times per week and they are approximately an hour in length. Psychosexual therapy therefore would be difficult for couples currently in a long distance relationship or for couples who feel it is impossible to have 3 hours a week of interrupted time together.
However it is worth considering that the impossibility of spending time together is likely to be the issue in itself. Couples often find that by working together to find the time for the exercises their sense of intimacy increases because they are both prioritising the relationship in a way that they might not have done for a long time. The behavioural programme that the couple will work through is called the Sensate Programme and it would be tailored to their needs with their therapist. This programme is not goal orientated it is simply about increasing intimacy and it will have techniques for managing particular dysfunctions worked into it.
Inevitably this behavioural programme will stir up emotions; some couples find the exercises surprisingly moving and are shocked by the intensity of feeling that they stir up while others might struggle to even do the exercises, whatever emotions occur as a result of the programme can be thought about within the therapy.
Psychosexual therapy can provide a space to think about sex in a safe and non-judgemental environment. Very often in psychosexual therapy the couple are set physical exercises as part of the therapeutic process. When there are sexual problems within a relationship the partners often resort to avoiding any physical intimacy for fear it might lead to sex and avoid talking about sex for fear it might lead to an argument. For many couples just sitting and thinking about the physical relationship alongside a therapist can release so much of this built up pressure. Couples and individuals who are experiencing sexual difficulties can feel very isolated because sex can also be a taboo topic between families and friends; it can be a huge relief not only to share their story, but also to have a therapist who is able to work with them to build the intimacy back into the relationship in a way the keeps in mind both partner’s needs and desires.
I provide specialist psychosexual services for individuals affected by spinal injury, including therapy, assessment and expert witness reporting. My work integrates trauma-informed approaches, psychosexual expertise, EMDR and cognitive behavioural therapy, offering a clear and sensitive understanding of the emotional, relational and sexual impact of catastrophic injury.
I accept referrals from solicitors, case managers, rehabilitation teams and private clients nationwide.
Services Provided
1. Expert Witness Reports (CPR 35 Compliant)
I prepare medico-legal reports in cases involving:
· Spinal cord injury
· Medical trauma or clinical negligence
· Sexual functioning difficulties following injury or surgery
· Psychological trauma affecting intimacy and relationships
· Post-traumatic stress, anxiety, depression and adjustment difficulties
· The emotional impact of physical disability on identity and relationships
2. Specialist Psychosexual Assessment
Comprehensive assessment covering:
· Sexual functioning, arousal, desire and satisfaction
· Impact of spinal injury on sexual identity and confidence
· Emotional wellbeing, relationships and trauma symptoms
· Adjustment challenges, grief and changes in self-perception
· Recommendations for therapy, rehabilitation and practical support
3. Therapy for Individuals and Couples
Evidence-based therapeutic support for:
· Loss of sexual function or reduced confidence
· Changes in intimacy and connection
· Body image concerns after trauma
· Medically-related trauma or fear responses
· Anxiety, depression, grief and adjustment difficulties
· Navigating relationship changes post-injury
· EMDR for trauma linked to the injury or medical treatment
Therapy integrates psychosexual approaches, trauma-informed CBT, EMDR and relational models.
Types of Therapies Offered
- Psychosexual Psychotherapist
- Sexual and Relationship Psychotherapist
Types of sessions
- Face to Face - Long Term
- Face to Face - Short Term
- Online Therapy
Office
BL1 4AP
United Kingdom (UK)
Wheelchair accessible View Map
Office
The White House42-44 Chorley New Road
BL1 4AP
United Kingdom (UK)
Wheelchair accessible View Map
UKCP College
- College for Sexual and Relationship Psychotherapy (CSRP)
ZH
Zoe Hargreaves
BL1
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